My Thick Accent

From Delhi’s Streets to Canadian Dreams: Story of Growth and Transformation | Ft. Vrinda Srikant Ep. 051

Gurasis Singh Season 2 Episode 51

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When Vrinda left the vibrant streets of Delhi for the vast landscapes of Canada, she embarked on a transformative journey defined by resilience and adaptability. Her incredible story is not just about facing the challenges of a new country, but embracing them as opportunities for growth.
Join us as she shares her experiences navigating cultural shifts, advocating for immigrants, and ensuring that talent is recognized and cherished, all while reflecting on her love for movies that challenge societal norms like "Three Idiots" and "Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara."

Parenting and career development take a central role in this episode as Vrinda reflects on her life transitions—from her days at Delhi University to her pivotal role at the Australian High Commission, and the cultural nuances encountered upon moving to England. With insights into the importance of gratitude, respect, and the balancing act of maintaining cultural ties, Vrindha provides a thoughtful examination of evolving parenting styles and educational perspectives. Her candid discussion about overcoming language barriers and the perseverance required to thrive in a new environment offers a relatable narrative for anyone facing similar life changes.

The podcast takes a heartfelt turn as Vrinda recounts her journey of personal and professional growth in Canada. From the challenges of adapting skills to setting personal boundaries, she highlights the importance of confidence and a positive perception in navigating life's complexities.
Vrinda illustrates how embracing change, forming meaningful friendships, and engaging in introspective dialogues can lead to profound personal development.

Tune in for a conversation that underscores the immigrant spirit and the transformative power of resilience and adaptability.

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Gurasis:

Hi, this is Gurasis Singh and you're listening to my Thick Accent Podcast. So, in the vast canvas of a new country, immigrants paint their stories with hues of resilience, determination and adaptability. Our guest today, a remarkable individual, and the inaugural guest for season two of our podcast, epitomizes this immigrant spirit. Her journey to Canada was an odyssey of courage and tenacity, leaving behind the familiar to embrace the unknown. Arriving in a land where the cold winds of change blew with intensity, she exhibited a remarkable openness to embrace any job, regardless of her background.

Gurasis:

These roles were not seen as detours, instead as stepping stones in this new land she now called home Canada. The determination to thrive propelled her forward, overcoming challenges with grace and grit. However, like many immigrants, she faced a common struggle the richness of her international experience was sometimes dismissed, her potential obscured by the myopic lens of Canadian experience. Undeterred, she embraced this challenge, not just for herself but for all who walked a similar path. In her journey to a leadership position, she actively advocates for putting new hires in the places where their talents truly belong. Join us as we delve into her life story, uncovering how her journey has unfolded, her inspiring perspective on success and adversity, and the wisdom she brings to the table in her professional role. Please welcome Vrindha Shrikant.

Vrinda:

I don't know what to say. I'm in awe. First off, Gurasis, thank you so much for allowing me to start your season two Definitely super honored to be here. That's a lot of things that you've said in the last 30 seconds and I'm not sure if I step into those shoes and I can live up to that your expectations in the next 60 minutes. But I will definitely try my best and I'm completely humbled to hear everything that you've said. So thank you for the fantabulous introduction.

Gurasis:

If you will, Absolutely, vrinda, and I think you will definitely share everything that you have achieved so far, and I have no doubts that this is going to be an amazing conversation the listeners are going to love. So in my season two, I am deciding to turn up the fun factor a little bit, because why not? We love fun. So I'm gonna start by asking you a few fun questions about you and about yourself. Okay, so first is, what's your go-to?

Vrinda:

breakfast oh, eggs, I need my proteins.

Gurasis:

Eggs uh for sure, eggs and bread, I would say yeah okay and share a favorite song or a dialogue or a movie and tell us why it's significant to you.

Vrinda:

I would say Three Idiots, the Hindi movie. It is significant to me because not just me, I think, a lot of people if you ask. I think it challenges the status quo of education in India and I think it was one of its kind back in 2016, I believe.

Vrinda:

When it came out, a lot of us learned a lot and the movie actually spoke a lot about what we've all been thinking about the education system, right, like it's a status quo. Everybody you know do things like that. You have to become an engineer, you have to become a doctor, you have to follow a path, and I think the main character of that role kind of challenged that and still did really really well for themselves. And again goes back to another podcast that you recently had challenged the status quo and I talked about it. Right, and it works. It really does. So I think it was an eye opener. I think it will always be, and I can watch that movie many, many times actually that one.

Vrinda:

And then I have another favorite actually it's Zindagi Na Milegi Dobara. Absolutely it's a fun movie. It's, you know, it teaches you how to have fun. It teaches you to, you know, kind of, take a step back and enjoy life to the fullest with whatever little resources you have. You know you can still have fun. So I think those two stand out to me. When you ask that question, you caught me, me off guard, but I think those two come to my mind right away. But yeah, yeah absolutely.

Gurasis:

I think I also love these both and the dialogue from td's. You know passion. I love this dialogue this explains everything what you really have to, what you should do in your life. Yeah, yeah. And even that narration of uh faran akhtar's, in faran akhtar's voice, of that poem you know, zinda ho tum, that narration is also beautiful.

Vrinda:

I think it speaks volume of what we all want to speak sometime. Right, it speaks the heart of the common man or common woman in.

Vrinda:

In growing up in India and going through the status quo, nothing against it. I think we've all done really, really well uh, for whatever we've. You know, however, we we've been born and bred, but I think it's a nice balance between keeping up your culture, keeping up your uh. You know parents their dreams for you, but being able to respect that and, at the same time, live your own life in your own terms. I think it's a really nice, sweet balance.

Gurasis:

I think that we all can represent, we carry I think wow, yeah, I think you have articulated it so perfectly, loved it. Oh, thank you. So my next question is if you had to teach one phrase in your native language, what would it it be and what does it mean?

Vrinda:

I would say, you know, coming from Delhi, and just the normal way of greeting, like just explaining that to somebody. I think it goes a long way. And, you know, sometimes I I do it as well when I'm really humbled and grateful for something. Even when I'm talking to people, it just comes to me naturally. So I just hold my hands and I just say thank you so much, and I think it kind of it's infectious. I've seen the other person, who's not, who's, you know English speaking or doesn't understand what this is, they automatically do that For some reason. It's just so humbling. I think it comes across as very humbling. So just holding your hands and truly, you know, showing your gratitude explicitly, I think that's something that I would like people to, you know, kind of acknowledge and take away.

Gurasis:

Yeah, amazing. So, lastly, if you could teleport back to a particular place from your home country for a day, where would it be and what would you do?

Vrinda:

Delhi. It just you know it will be Delhi, and where will it. Where will I go? What will I do, I think, if I have to be teleported to a place I would say have gulgappas in the streets of maybe Surinagar or Krolbagh, just the street food, enjoy that, and just the hustle bustle. You know, very desi at heart, very Delight at heart, you can call it. That's what I would do, that's what comes to my mind right away Enjoy shopping and do that kind of stuff and meet my friends, live that life again.

Gurasis:

Okay, great. So speaking of that, let's talk a little bit more about your time spent in Delhi. Tell us a little bit about your growing years and also the high school.

Vrinda:

Absolutely so. My parents migrated from South India, so my maiden name was Vrinda Krishnan.

Vrinda:

Before I got married and we but, my parents lived in Delhi for a long, long time before we were born, so I think they migrated in 60s, 70s, I believe, and then we were me and my sister we were born. So I think they migrated in 60s, 70s, I believe, and then we were, me and my sister. We were both born in Delhi and, yeah, the upbringing was very simple, middle class family, I would say. My mom was a central government employee. My dad worked for the Australian High Commission. Before that he worked for the American Embassy. So we lived in Arkhipuram, which is more like a central government employees uh, you know homes that you live in in that kind of an area.

Vrinda:

Um went to a convent which were, you know, was nice for our parents to have, you know, been able to educate us in a nice, very brilliant at that point in time, I would say, uh, education system we had that was run by nuns and you know it was quite a lot of discipline and inculcation of, you know, a lot of Catholic values, if you will right, going to the chapel every day and just a different lifestyle from what you would have got when you were being born and bred in a South Indian family in North of India with the. You know your South Indian culture, but then you're also trying to mingle with your North Indian friends, and then you go to school, then you're trying to inculcate. You know a different form of discipline altogether. But I think, all in all, I think from very young stages of my life we've been so adaptable to so many different. You know styles of living in one day, like get up in the morning, you know you're getting ready for school, and then you, your mom, like you got a lunchbox, you make a lunch, she'll make you a lunchbox, and that was usually be parathas or something like that, because all of the central government employees pretty much function the same way, I believe, like all of the kids used to get the same thing. So we'll take that.

Vrinda:

Go to school right when you enter your school, you go to the chapel, you kneel down, you do your name of the father and all of that. You do your prayers. Finish school, you know. Then hang out with your friends who are Punjabis, so you know. Go to their house. Their grandparents can't speak Hindi, so they're speaking in Punjabi with you, and then you kind of understand Punjabi, learn Punjabi as well At the same time. It was fine. And then come back home, you know, then change again into your culture that you know you're being bred in, which is your South Indian culture. What have you? So it was? It's been kind of inculcated in people, not just me, a lot of people whose parents have migrated, who live in a different state in India. We talk about immigration, we talk about that change. I think a lot of us have gone through that change already in our own home countries and we can resonate with that and it's like childhood has.

Vrinda:

You know, I have no complaints. We've, like I said, great, great schooling. You know, whatever we are today obviously is because of the basics that we learned in school and in high school and what have you Lots of, as you know. I do feel, like you know, as a kid, migrating, we feel like you know there's racism, there's, you know, accent issues and what have you. But I think we, we all face that, especially coming from a South Indian background, living in the north of India, we are Hindi was very strong because we learned Hindi in Delhi, right, but I still believe that, you know, in those days, in the 80s and the 90s, we still had that little bit of a difference between, you know, north Indian, south Indian, which is not there anymore.

Vrinda:

I feel, you know, with the global movement and people living all around the globe, now also in India, there's a lot of movement. Things have changed. They've come a long way, but not at that time we used to, you know, kind of have that Madrasi kind of you know, labeling and all that. I've personally gone through all that. You know the fact that my teachers always thought I couldn't do a great job. But when I was in grade 12 I did um, I did excel in my I took commerce, by the way, my 11th and 12th um. I came first in my whole entire school in commerce. So I did kind of go to that extent where I was like I had to prove something to some people and you know I'm going to do that. So I did take it really to my heart all of the bullying and all of the you know whatever. But I think it's important to also take it in the right stride.

Vrinda:

Right, yes, it was at the time you feel like, oh, my God you. It was stressful at the time, I think, when you're a teenager and you know people are trying to label you and stuff like that. But I think what comes out of it is what you make of it right, like it's. That's important. But at the time you don't know that. You just react the way you do now. I know that because I'm mature.

Vrinda:

I look back, I think how I reacted, but I think that that was it my upbringing, but it was good, no complaints. Complaints Like, like I said, very you know, it's important to think about it positively because whatever you take out of it, you learn, you put into practice and then you become a better person, Right? So thank you to all of those teachers, Thank you to all of those friends of mine, my you know neighbors, my friends, my school, my you know neighbors, my friends, my school buddies, you know who did what they did for you know, for giving me the opportunity to learn and grow from that. Yeah, and then that was history. And then I went to Delhi University to do my graduation in commerce. My dad was working for the Australian High Commission, so, so, um, he could, uh, you know, get me a job with the australian high commission and you know, back then it was huge. You worked there for 40 years, I believe right yes, I did.

Vrinda:

I did and it was. It was huge at the time. You're so young, you're just out of your college and you get a job which pays you so well, like what more could you ask?

Vrinda:

So did that and it was fun. I still love my colleagues. We're still all in touch. That actually shaped that. Those four years were very crucial for my career growth. I would say that actually changed a lot of things within me, unknowingly At the time. Again, you're very young, what do you know? When you're, I feel, like the twenties, I'm, you know, probably aging myself, which is perfectly fine. But I think the twenties that we went through is very different to the twenties that this generation is going through. And I can say that because I have a 21 year old and I can see that the level of maturity, the clarity that they have about what they want to do in future, they're very clear and I love seeing that. And I think when we were in our 20s we learned things unknowingly At least I can speak for myself Like I learned it, but I wasn't recognizing the fact of what I'm learning at that point in time.

Vrinda:

It was all you know, there's a lot to unpack. Like I said, now I can say there's a lot to unpack because those were my transitioning periods of those first job, fantastic exposure, working with us, living in Delhi, working with Australian expats, learning from them, growing just the way you know how you would put yourself forward in a professional environment. And then you know, during all this time I got married, and you know, and then had my son right away. So did all of that, and I lost my mother, actually when I was, when I just finished my graduation. So that was definitely a blow, but nevertheless, life goes on and I know my mom has been watching me from up above and anything.

Vrinda:

I am today is because she has been there as the pillar of strength from then to now. And life goes on and my husband decided to do his master's from Leeds Business School and then we moved on to the next phase of our life, if you will, as new immigrants into.

Gurasis:

England. So before we talk about that, I want to just go back to your parenting style once again. You talked about that a couple of times and since you are a mother yourself, so what is something from your parents' upbringing style that you are incorporating into yours, or what is something different that you are doing? And I also want to highlight this one thing you talked about you being not the brightest student, right, or. A lot of focus was on like what kind of grades are you getting and everything, and. But now norms a little bit have changed. It's not the same anymore. It's more about the person instilling those values and principles and people, rather than just focusing on marks and everything. So, keeping all that in mind, tell us about your parenting style.

Vrinda:

For sure. It's a great question, Gurasi. I think certain things that we as parents have inculcated in Samir would be the gratitude, the culture. We speak to him in Hindi.

Vrinda:

He went to England when he was very young. Regardless whether he calls me at work or he, he's in front of me, both me and my husband. We speak to him in Hindi. He responds back in English, which is fine, but we know that ever since he was born, he's always heard Hindi. He can survive. You know, he can speak Hindi very comfortably, he does. He shies away, but we've seen him speak Hindi very comfortably, so we know he. He shies away, but we've seen him speak Hindi very comfortably, so we know he can.

Vrinda:

So that's one thing that we wanted to, regardless of where we live, language is very important. Secondly, just the gratitude and the respect, for you know people, that's it, regardless of what their age is. I think it's important to have that respect for anybody and that I think we you know, we've inculcated in him and he respects his surroundings, he respects his. You know people that he speaks with and you know he's kind of got that. I feel those are very important, non-negotiable things for us as parents, things that we are mindful of, that we don't want to repeat that we felt like you know, that wasn't the way we wanted to be. I don't know, like at that time we didn't, but I think, just with the generational gap, I would say it's very important to not enforce what you want to become, to make your kids do that.

Vrinda:

I think it's very important. Let them be, do what you want to do. I think trust is very important. It goes a long way, I think, putting the trust in your kids, not that our parents didn't have.

Vrinda:

That's another thing we got from our parents, both my husband and I. Our parents trusted us so much. They just trusted every decision that we made, and I think that is something that we are paying forward. Or we got from our parents and we continue to do that, with our parenting style as well, and grades and all of that. I think it's parents and we continue to do that with, uh, with our parenting, uh, you know, style as well, and grades, and all of that. I think it's just not us as parents, it's just all of this generation of parents who are, you know, like us, who have young kids or teenager kids or kids who are in their 20s. It is almost irrelevant um at least outside of india.

Vrinda:

Uh, in india I do have, you know, my sister-in-law, still there. We, we have very close relatives who still have that kind of the environment is still. It's changing. It's come a long way but I think it's hard to make that leap of change with the education system altogether. But I think also you know just wherever you are. I think grades don't matter. I think they're recognizing the fact of what your child likes to do. I think that's important as a parent and I think we try our best.

Vrinda:

I don't know if we are 100% there, I don't know that it's hard for me to say, but I think at least both my husband and I we have. Whenever we talk, we make sure that we recognize what the child likes to do and we encourage them to do that and support them and be there for them to say you want to do this, no problem, go for it. But it's also important, as a parent, to show them the right path. Right, like we can't yeah, it's a fine balance. Like we don't have a manual for parenting, right, so it's it's. Every parent is different. You, you know you do your best, given the circumstances, given what you, what you have in your hand. It's also important to show them the path. It's one thing to like something, but it's also another thing to make sure that you're smart about what you like. At the end of the day, the outcome has to be you making money for yourself, right?

Vrinda:

so you have to be smart enough to think about that and being educated, being, you know, living in this country for or living abroad for so long, or just having that exposure to education and that path, the career path I think it's definitely beneficial and I think we would not be doing justice by not sharing our knowledge with them in a way that not, like I said, not enforcing it or not making them do something, but at the same time having that open conversation hey, have you looked into this? Hey, did you do, you think you can do this or do you? How about this? Do you like this? You know, asking those open-ended questions. I think we're a little bit more mindful. I think this generation of parents I, you know I've seen a lot of other friends of mine who have kids of the same age. I think we're, all you know. We relate to, uh, parenting, uh, quite a lot, right, we, we definitely do so and also, being first immigrant parents, it's, it's hard yeah, absolutely.

Gurasis:

You know the. At least I have also seen that change happening within my vicinity. At least my sisters, I would say even my babis and brother sisters and brother-in-laws, and everybody has has really integrated that thing in their children. That marks are not everything. You know just exactly what you said. I have seen that change happening and I'm sure even the next generation is gonna be even better than that. They're gonna do the. Make changes for sure. But tell us what was your dream career growing up?

Vrinda:

growing up I wanted to become a. Then my mom wanted me to do that. That I, you know. I don't know. I could have tried giving it a shot probably, but that was my dream career.

Gurasis:

So let's just pivot towards your move to England. Tell us what influenced the decision to move.

Vrinda:

So my husband decided he wanted to do his master's and he wanted to do his master's and he wanted to do his master's abroad MBA. And when we were looking for options, I think Leeds Business School actually stood out at the time. So we packed our bags, we said, ok, here we go, let's, let's go. And we did that and we landed in London and then we moved to. Obviously we went to Leeds from there on and we started, you know, our little stint in England from there, yeah, and you have mentioned that it was your first recognition of the thick accent there.

Gurasis:

Talk, talk a little bit about that experience yes, absolutely.

Vrinda:

So. You know when, like I said, when you're, the exposure is so important because you learn so much. And here here it started right, because English was. English is not our first language and we recognize that. Right, english is something that we've learned and thankfully, like I said, growing up we went to really good schools. So you know, we've always spoken English which was grammatically correct. There was no issues with that. But, remember, we've also, regardless of which school you go to, the way you're, taught english, this certain words, the way you pronounce them, uh, absolutely different to how either it should be pronounced if you want to call it in an english way, or in a way that people would understand when you articulate, right.

Vrinda:

So when we first moved to england, I mean, there was no issues in us talking in english, but I think it was also, um, almost, I would say, how many years ago, was it 2006? So, almost like 20, 15, 17 years ago, things were different. People were not so welcoming and people had the audacity to actually tell you on your face what, what are you talking about, or you know, and stuff like that. So there were certain, there were many, many instances where, you know, I went out to work. My husband was a student, so I was working full time, lots of challenges, right. We had a little three-year-old with us at the time and you know lots of things were going on. But when it came to, you know, finding work, we'll go out. I'll go out for an interview, for example, and then they'll say, oh, your english is really, uh, you know how come you speak really good english.

Vrinda:

I'm surprised that people still say that, right, it's 17 years ago. People said that was already quite shocking because they were so oblivious of where india was and how education was so important in india. And people still say that. I've heard that in some of your podcasts and I've gone through it myself as well, you know, living in Canada for 10 years, but at that time that was just not it. Some people would you know, when I've spoken to some people in England, they would actually make you feel they don't understand what you're talking about. Like intentionally, intentionally, they'd say, okay, say that again, repeat that word, and that you know that kind of was almost, I would say, a turning point for me, because I took it as a challenge and I would say, you know, it was almost like trying to become perfect at pronouncing certain words that we were taught to pronounce differently. So I think that's when I recognize my thick accent. Not to change your accent or anything, I think it's just you don't have to change yourself to fit in.

Gurasis:

I'm a big believer of that.

Vrinda:

But at the same time, I also feel like you have to work on yourself to an extent that you're able to articulate yourself in a manner that you want to come across. That's important, because you might be trying to say something which people understand completely differently because of the words that you choose to use in that sentence. And that was the recognition that I, you know, I thought about, or I taught myself to think okay, this is what I want to say. I'm thinking it comes to us naturally. We think in Hindi and then we translate, not anymore. I've seen a lot of people, all of this generation. They're smart, I think.

Vrinda:

Also, the way people are taught English is different. Now I, but at the time, you know, you think in hindi or you, and then you just translate that and that doesn't come across as to what you were trying to say. And that's where I think for myself, that's where I was kind of um, it was a point where I was like, okay, I need, I need to switch this, what am I going to do? So that was, that was my thick accent recognition. You know, face, if you will, and then, and then just educate, like I took that upon myself, to learn and pronounce and spend time pronouncing it myself certain words that I thought I wasn't pronouncing correctly and, yeah, I think it only benefited me. I didn't take it in a way. Oh my, I did feel bad, like everybody does, right it throws you out.

Vrinda:

It's like it throws your confidence out of the window. I can tell you that much. As much as you gather yourself, you're already new to a country and you can say whatever you want, and I'm a big believer of the fact that they didn't call me to London. I made this way. They didn't call me Right.

Vrinda:

They didn't tell me come we. You know we need you. Right, I made that decision, we made that decision. It's my responsibility to make myself comfortable to a point that I don't blame anybody else, Right? It's easy to say, oh my God, these people are racist, they, they will be racist, they don't want you there right. Like it's. Let them be the way. That's not. That doesn't mean that they're doing the right thing or you're doing the wrong thing or you're doing the wrong thing.

Vrinda:

It's not about the blame game here, but I think like I said the racism or the bullying or the Madrasi North Indian.

Vrinda:

All of that's already there everywhere in the world. Why are we so hurt when we come abroad? And you know people actually teach you how to speak or not teach you. They put you in your place, tell you that you're not, you don't speak our language and so I don't know. I took it in that way and I think it's just put me in a. It put me at a better position from you know the way I speak, the way I think, and I don't think there's anything wrong with that yeah, absolutely, and I think everything that you have said is literally the essence of the podcast I.

Gurasis:

That's actually what cuss is all about, and you all said it very correctly that in no way. No, we are pointing fingers that you did this to me, you did that to me. Through my podcast, I'm just trying to tell people that sometimes all we need is a little bit of acknowledgement, to just be a little bit of hurt, because, for example, in canada, we are here to stay. We are not going back anywhere, you know. In fact, we're even bringing our relatives here now, you know. So we are here to stay.

Gurasis:

And I also always use this one analogy. I recently spoke in toronto somewhere at an event, and I use analogy of you know, imagine you're walking into a room and somebody gets some tell me, gurus, I don't like your clothes, go change it. Will you ever go and change it? No, you will not. So why is that? When it comes to our accents, we all just want to change it, just because somebody doesn't understand, there's somebody doesn't like it.

Gurasis:

And then I also said you know how, yes, my understanding of fashion might have evolved in the past five, six years. I may be able to buy some articles which I couldn't buy back in India maybe, but doesn't mean I'll just stop wearing the way I'm wearing my clothes or I stop wearing the way the turban I'm wearing, right. Similarly it happens with the pronunciation. Since childhood we are taught to say certain things in a certain way. We are asked to, you know, say our consonants properly properly, say our vowels properly a, e, I, o. You know we all have done that. But when you come here you see that rolling of r's is different. Work becomes work, birth becomes birth, turban becomes turban, guruses become guruses, or guruses or even juruses at times, you know. So this is not part part of it, right?

Gurasis:

absolutely so I think, I think it's high time that and I don't blame them, because that's how they were taught to pronounce certain things all these people and I think it's high time that we guys should also just own it. And why to be embarrassed by it?

Vrinda:

just own it, howsoever you are, yeah 100 and I, I, I totally endorse everything that you're saying and I think that your uniqueness, your imperfections, make you what you are and and.

Vrinda:

I think everybody should be proud and wear that very proudly on your sleeve. And you know, we learn, we grow, and I think that's about it right, like that's why we share what we learn. So other people can either, you know, listen to it, because it's nice to hear other people's story, not for anything, I think, just to relate. You know, you feel like I'm not alone in this absolutely all the podcasts that we've seen there's.

Vrinda:

There's a unique line of integrity yeah, integrity and similarity thread between all of the people who come to your podcast and speak about immigration, regardless of where they come from. Whether they come from uh, you know, columbia I know you interviewed somebody from Colombia, a journalist or whether they come from Nigeria. Whether they come from India, Pakistan or wherever right Like there's a unique thread of similarity, which is just sharing your story, sharing the authentic story where you come from, what you learned, and that's just wonderful.

Gurasis:

Absolutely so. What kind of job were you doing in england when you were there?

Vrinda:

so, um, when I, uh, when I was in england, we we were in leeds. So when I was in leeds I worked for a uh, legal um company. It was a massive legal firm and I worked there as a legal assistant again, um, it was, it was fantastic. It was all related to banking again. So what we really did was people buying properties. We used to do the closing of uh those properties. So liaison with between the bank and the realtor, or two different banks, uh, you know, taking the mortgage from one bank, paying off the other bank, refinancing and stuff like that. So very interesting stuff. Learned a lot there from a point of view of systems, very new technology. I think there were about 1,500, 2,000 employees in that organization. And then I worked for an architect firm. It was a small firm called the Low Rock Architects where I took care of all of their admin stuff. Again, learned a lot there as well from point of view of, you know, just presenting yourself administrative work, how different it is. You know how admin stuff is done.

Vrinda:

And those jobs were just to keep us afloat, to be honest, in Leeds, because my husband was a full time student, you know we had to balance our little one with, you know, kind of dropping picking, but we really had a good set of friends there with the university. There's a lot of people who came from Delhi who were really close-knit, so it was like a family. So we had a good time there and then we moved to London. After my husband finished his graduation In London, I could go back, start working for the South African High Commission, because that's what I left when I left Delhi.

Vrinda:

So it was just wonderful to just go in and they welcomed me with the open arms. It was just the best place you can dream of working. I think it was like a dream come true and just very, very fast. Life London was, you know cause we we were living in the outskirts so we had to take the train. It was a bit of a whirlwind, if you will, because I had to bring Samir to downtown Toronto, drop him in school, take another tube, go back to work and then finish work, run, go get him, because every minute they charge you by a minute for childcare, like they do in Canada.

Vrinda:

I think there's no difference there, but it was so expensive you just had to. It was just a little rat's race, and then poor Samir used to be like a little boy right.

Vrinda:

Four or five years old at the time, and then we used to sit on the train and some very fond memories of those times, and you know he used to. We used to play quiz. I used to do a quiz for him every day to keep him, you know, on the train, just uh, to keep him engaged, if you will and I used to ask him capital cities of, uh, different countries across the globe, and it used to be so fun, uh, everybody sitting around us, they used to start participating and it was nice. I still remember that and samir remembers that vividly too every time we talk about our time in London. It used to be an hour ride on the train and we didn't have at the time iPhone was just very new. We had the BlackBerrys at the time, so it wasn't like we could watch a video or something on the phone Like kids would normally do that, ipads and stuff. It was just evolving, if you will right.

Gurasis Singh:

So it was still. Still how creative can you be as?

Vrinda:

a mom to keep your child engaged rather than handing them an iPad or a you know iPhone.

Gurasis:

So it was fun and then that's it so moving on, let's just pivot towards talking about the transition to Canada. What was the process for you like and how long did it take you?

Vrinda:

so you know it was just the process was we wanted to go into a better economy. At the time when we came here, the economy was booming in Canada, so that was one of the reasons. So we decided to move. And when we decided to move, we wanted to obviously make that decision really quickly because we, you know, we weren't in our 20s anymore when we were deciding to move, so it wasn't like we had another 10 years, to our credit, that we can make life from scratch. So we decided to just get on with it and see what is the quickest move.

Vrinda:

So I k, I started studying, so I came on a student visa and my husband got a. So that was the. That was kind of the way we decided, because we knew with his mba stuff he's going to shine, he definitely gets something very quickly and the easiest way was to come in as a student. And then we just took our chance right, like we didn't want to wait for three or four years to get our permanent residence and land. So we ended up in Vancouver. I took a little course in management in Vancouver and in a college there and my husband started looking for jobs. Again, you know, welcome to Canada, piece we came. He was, he was on a, he was on a work permit and we very quickly realized that if you're on a work permit, it was an open work permit. It wasn't something that was welcome in this country. They were looking for landed immigrants, which was a bit of a surprise for us. I mean, he could work with any company for three years but he interviewed with some really great companies.

Vrinda:

They loved him, they wanted to hire him. But then they were like, okay, we have a candidate who is permanent resident, so we'll we'll prefer him to you because we don't know what's going to happen. But, um, you know, you think something and something else happens. So, my, so we tried. You know, we really wanted to live in Vancouver because you know Toronto or BC, right, that's where you go. So it was a nice place. We wanted to live there, but life had different plans for us.

Vrinda:

So, my, so he went for a few interviews. We almost got to a point where, you know, it was desperation, right, you have a child and you know we need to get on with it very quickly. So he pretty much started applying for jobs everywhere across Canada. He was like, okay, you know, let me see what I can get. So he, he got this job.

Vrinda:

He ended up with this job in Saskatchewan, in Weyburn, with Sastel, which is, which is the only crown company in Canada, which is a telecom company. And he did. He was offered, uh, you know a good, uh, you know good position and he was like, okay, I'll take it, like we're gonna take it regardless, right, we and uh they agreed to sponsor as well, because it was a crown company. Our whole immigration was going to uh get uh on fast track easier. So he said I'm taking it. So he, uh, he left, he came here, and then they supported us. They said we're going to apply for your work permit through sastel, uh, and then we'll do the permanent residence stuff like that. So then that's it. That that was our beginning of, uh, you know, our life in saskatchewan canadian journey.

Gurasis:

So tell us about your uh day, initial thoughts or emotions when you landed in Canada.

Vrinda:

It was excitement when we first came. It was positivity. It was looking forward to a new life for Sameer, for us you know what are we going to do in this country? It was a little bit of anxiousness too. I think that just comes with the unknown little bit of anxiousness too.

Vrinda:

I think that just comes with the unknown, yeah, um, the ambiguity of what you're going to end up doing and how long will it. How long is it going to take you to get to the citizenship phase? Right, because we've already gone through it once in england. We didn't. We had to go through it again here, obviously by choice, like I said. I mean, I would hate to blame anybody or sound like you know, somebody made me do it. It was our doing, we decided to, but that also came with a lot of stress. You know it's different, like I said, if you were in our 20s and we came here to study and we had the whole life and there were no dependents, we could do whatever we want. We could go wherever we want, could go wherever we want. I think we also were mindful of moving our son from place to place to place, which was also a big kind of decision for us to keep in mind as we do that. But kids are very resilient.

Gurasis:

So I want to talk a little bit more about your time in Weber and Saskatchewan, and I remember you were telling me that when you moved to Canada, it was your second immigration and you have said that you were quite polished and ready to mingle, so to say. So tell us about your time you spent there. And then obviously you were from an HR background but you were not working in that and you were ready to take on any job, and I still can't forget you told me that. You said that I was ready to do anything regardless of my background, and this mindset is amazing to have, especially when you are new to the country. Tell us how that mindset has helped you in your Canadian journey in the initial years.

Vrinda:

You put it so well, gurasi, I have to admit, and you know, yes. So when we moved to Weyburn, saskatchewan, obviously a couple of things Right, I want to continue, I really did want to continue my studies, for sure I wanted to take that leap. But that being said, a lot of constraints Right. We wanted to get into the job market. At least one person was good, like my husband, had a good job. We had, you know, financially, money was flowing in, that was taken care of. But then obviously I wanted to get into the workforce as quickly as I could as well. So I went around applying.

Vrinda:

Waven is a very small place for our listeners who don't know where Waven is, if you Google it, it's a very small place outside of Regina, the capital of Saskatchewan. It's about an hour and 15 minutes drive south of Regina. The total population of Hueybuna is about 10,000, give or take. So that's how many people live there, and it's predominantly a farming community. So the people who live there there's a lot of immigration happening now, of course, due to, you know, the PR and the easy ways of getting your permanent residency and stuff like that. But you still, you know, it's a very transient immigrant population, if you will right Like people come there get their PR citizenship, move to BC or, you know, calgary or Edmonton, or come here to GTA.

Vrinda:

So, to answer your question, yes, I was ready to do whatever I could, because it's very important to recognize where you are and know your audience. I feel I'm in a place where I'm not going to get a job which is going to be, you know, it's going to be relatable to my experience very clearly or I'm not going to get a job to become a GM in any company where people don't even know me. They're not going to take a bet on me.

Vrinda:

They have no idea who I am. I just came here by face value. Nobody's going to take a bet on you to. You know, give you that position. So what can I do differently, was my thought. I just wanted to get into the workforce just to understand the culture, work culture of Canada. That was my intention. My intention was nothing else.

Vrinda:

So I went around, I dropped my resume at Walmart, dropped my resume at Superstore, mom pop shop, whatever, all the banks everywhere. Walmart called me and I didn't really apply for a position. It was such a small place that you just go and drop your resume and somebody will call you. You know, there's no technology or there's no online applications and stuff. You do that at a later stage. So I got a call and then I spoke to this wonderful lady she's the assistant manager and she spoke with me and she said, after like a 20 minute you know conversations she said why don't you come see me, you know next week, and let's just do an interview? I said absolutely so, I went there for an interview.

Vrinda:

We had more like a formal interview. I said absolutely so, I went there for an interview. We had more like a formal interview. She asked me about my background and all of that. And then she, right after the interview, she said you know what, Rinda, I don't think I will be able to give you a cashier's job. And and you know what, I wasn't. It was OK. I was like OK, but I would like some solid feedback. Why is that? So, I can, you know, kind of improve for the next time? And she said no, because you're overqualified. You have a lot of experience. Would you like to take up a role as an assistant manager? And I said absolutely. I will like yeah, you know absolutely. So that was like the frontline customer service if you go into walmart you see all of the tellers, all of the cashiers and the front desk, right the customer service desk.

Vrinda:

So the person who leads that team is called the customer experience manager or whatever, what have you right?

Vrinda:

so I took on that. I had about 35, 40 people reporting into me and it was very, very challenging. It was. I was just, uh, really really grateful and thankful that I, you know, got an opportunity to get into the workforce just to understand. You know how people work there, right, like what is the thought process around? Again, it was a small place, like I said, predominantly, you know a lot of local people, if you will right, like farming community or people who live there for their lives. It was just a different environment. Also, again, there was a little bit of what do you call it? People didn't. It was hard for them to accept that I was leading their team right They've been there for

Vrinda:

20, 25 years. They almost revolted, but not revolted, you know what I mean. They won't show up for their shifts because I put them in a certain shift, because they've worked there for 15 years or 20 years. They don't want to listen. They, you know, and stuff like that. So I went through that piece. Lots of learning experience there as well.

Vrinda:

I think I had the courage to really stand up for myself and in certain situations actually say to them on their face like nobody stopped you from taking this role. On their face, like nobody stopped you from taking this role. Yeah, you know, be my guest. You've been here 20 years, more than happy to be led by you. You do this role. Why did they give it to me? Like, think about it. It's easy to just stand up and say I don't want to listen to this person. So I think those were learning experiences and also experience to stand up for yourself and say, hey, I'm not going to take bs, right, so it was. It was a good experience. But then it got to a point where over the weekends I was working constantly, right, I was just it was so intriguing and I was having fun in that job.

Vrinda:

It was so fast paced that I was almost losing track of my personal life, like my son was growing up at the time and I wanted to spend time with him. My husband had the weekends off and because of this fast-paced, you know job, I was working my weekends and even weekdays when I got time off. I used to go work there because it was it's a small place, right, everybody knows everybody, so I'll just go spend a couple of hours there, and that wasn't good for my personal life. So that's when I started actively looking for, you know nine to five Monday to Friday jobs just to find a work life balance, and I applied to the banks quite a few times but never had a call from any of the banks. Of course, why would they write? I don't bring a banking background, but then there was this open house that happened in CIBC in Weyburn.

Gurasis:

So you know you talked about how people a little shocked for shocked to see you like a different person leading the teams. But that wasn't the only time you were questioned like oh, you are the manager here because the same you had similar experience you had within the CIB in the initially as well. But obviously you said you went to an open house, you took the job as an interlaboral position, you were promoted to a senior person and then eventually you became the branch manager. And that's where also you have heard this question oh so you are the branch manager here and that's solely because they haven't seen a brown person leading a branch ever before you. So talk a little bit about that experience yeah, um, people have been really welcoming.

Vrinda:

I would say, you know, for the most part, but I think you always find people who, who question the status quo, and there's nothing wrong with that. The only thing I would say is there's, there's, no, there's nothing wrong in asking the question. The way you ask it is what makes all the difference right. So the way that question was asked to me was, um, as, like, they added a now with it. So you are the branch manager now question mark. So that kind of uh, you know, took me to a different tangent there and I just politely asked them you know, I had a smile on my face, let's keep it professional and it's not personal. I just, uh, you know, ask them to explain what do you mean by that. Can you, can you tell me more uh, so I can answer your question? What? Do you mean by that right?

Vrinda:

and then, uh, you know they, they just had questions around. You know where did you come from, what is your education and stuff, uh, you know how, and the only thing I said to them was, uh, you know, you're asking me questions that are too personal to me and I don't think this is a platform for me to, you know, dive into it. I'll be more than happy to share anything professionally related that you want to know about your banking or what have you, but anything personal I don't think I'm comfortable in sharing that with you. But, thank you, I appreciate your question and I'm hoping that you know you can continue to have your trust in me and my team, and I left it at that. I think it's important to be professional, but it is also an eye opener but a lot of people to know that the world is moving in a different way. This is not the first thing. This is not the last.

Gurasis:

You'll see a lot of people like me moving forward who are, uh, you know, there to help you to be a part of the community and to stay right yeah, like you said, yeah, and I think, like you said, that it was a small place and you were the first person to kind of they came across, and I'm sure things have changed now and many I'm sure, like many people will be inspired by our journey here, listening to you that, okay, maybe saskatchan and Weyburn is the place to go to and to start your journey, and I remember you also telling me that that place has less competition and you also have a higher standard of living as well, and that's how even helped you to grow personally as well in that place. So tell us a little bit about the city, like how, how's the city like in general?

Vrinda:

Honestly, in my true words, it's a sleepy little town. Regina is definitely growing, it's much better. But the one good thing is because everybody knows everybody Once you live there, like in two, three years time when we started knowing people from different backgrounds. Obviously we had, no, obviously we had no family there, right? So no, we have to build our social circle from scratch there's a lot of immigrant population as well.

Vrinda:

But I think the most important thing is to come out of your comfort zone. That's what I feel is important for you to be comfortable yourself. So you need to come out of your comfort zone, learn to do things that you haven't done in so long. So I learned curling. As part of the CIBC team, I used to put a team together to curl in the local curling tournament. I hadn't even heard of curling before, but then I learned how to curl and I feel very proud of you know being able to represent our team, being able to be a part of that team, curling with that team at least for three years in a row. So that's something new that I learned. And then we learned skiing. When we were there, we made you know different friends and I've always appreciated being a part of a group of people that doesn't look like me. I think that's important to grow Like. Come out of your comfort zone, be comfortable with the uncomfortable. A lot of people talk about that and that literally is walking the talk right.

Gurasis:

You need to be able to do that very comfortably and there's nothing wrong with that I think that is a great segue to my next segment, where I remember asking you that what have you discovered, vrinda, in the past 10 years? And you told me I have discovered that confidence within me, and you said, the confidence that has brought you this far, with all of the chances that have happened in your life, everything that has happened in your life. Like you said, you know you learned curling, you learned skiing, and you said you were like ready to take on anything that came your way. I remember you telling me you want to put like a barbecue, I'll go ahead and do that. You want me to start knitting? I'll go and start knitting. So tell me how all that, all that evolution, happened and what, what, what kind of like words of wisdom do you like to pass on to the listeners who might be going to the similar phase, new to the country, kind of lost, ready to mingle but don't know where to go? What, what would you tell them?

Vrinda:

you put it so well, uh, and you make me, you, you make me sound like somebody, the guru, yeah. Yeah, yeah, no, and thank you for doing that, but I think there's one more thing that I also you know confidence, of course. I think it's important to put your best foot forward. It's also you know, life is only 10% of what happens to you. 90% is how you deal with it.

Gurasis:

Love that.

Vrinda:

That's important.

Vrinda:

And I think that the sooner people realize that, I think they would be in the right path. I mean, I'm nobody to preach. I'm humbled for this opportunity to talk to you and share my experience, but this is just my perspective of looking at life. Life will present to you and only 10% of life is what happens. The glass is half full or glass is half empty is your perception of it, and when you perceive it as half empty, then it is half empty. When you perceive it as half full, then you go a long way.

Vrinda:

One other thing that I've learned in the last 10 years the question that you asked and I had a chance to reflect is I used to listen to respond. Now I listen to understand and I think when we can differentiate between that, it's very important. When people talk to you, or they criticize you or they say something, or they just are talking just talk to understand where they're coming from, because mostly I don't know about other people, but I do see. When I see other people, you make some observations and you see most people are ready to respond. Somebody asked something. Let me respond, let me defend myself. I think a lot of stages in your life comes where you just need to take a backseat and listen and understand where they're coming from, what they're saying, before you take the step. And sometimes it's okay not to respond. It's okay for other people to talk, it's okay for you to be the listener, and I think that's one thing that I have learned personally in my journey. You know it's okay to just, you know, be there, listen and listen to understand. So these are the two things that I feel. You know the glass is half full, half empty. You know it's how you perceive life is important and ready to do everything, anything in life. You know, everybody's journey is different. Everybody is in a different stage of life.

Vrinda:

I have seen a lot of people who are immigrants. They come in and they come in with an attitude of this is who I was, this is how I want to be. There's nothing wrong with that. There's absolutely nothing wrong with that. But the only thing I would say is there has to be a reality check. When you come in with that expectation for yourself, for your career, make sure that you've done your homework so you can put yourself in that pedestal. Because when you come in with that expectation I was a GM, I was a VP I won't budge. I will not take anything less than that Kudos to you.

Vrinda:

But what homework did you do to get there would be my question If you want me, as a hiring manager, to hire you as a whatever you came here for, maybe a GM, absolutely, but show me and tell me why should I do that when I have somebody else who's been here for 10 years, who's equally good as you? I think that USP that you bring to the table is important for people to be able to articulate, for people to be able to deliver, people to be. You know, carry on your shoulder.

Vrinda:

Like jo dikta, we dikta Simple, yeah, absolutely. If you are not able to show that you know, if you, if you can for our people, for our listeners who understand english, is you know what? What you see is what gets sold right at the end of the day. So that's what it is.

Gurasis:

so that's, that's, I think, is uh, in a nutshell, absolutely I love that line you know 10 percent of what happens to you and 90 percent how you react to. This is, I think, a great, a great word of advice for everybody, because we do have this tendency to really see all the say all the time oh you know, this happened to me, that happened to me, but I think happens to you, it happens for you. We just have to see the bigger picture around it, that why it is happening, and just you see that. And also I always say that god or higher power or whosoever the people you know preach to or look up to, I would say that god will never put you in places where he knows that you won't be able to handle this. He always put you in situations. They know that you have the capacity and the audacity to really tackle this situation.

Gurasis:

So I think I learned it the hard way. I would was the one I would say, like a few years ago, would question that why this is happening to me, why that is happening to me. But you just forget that a lot of amazing things also happened to me. Why didn't I question it then? So I think it's important for us to see that, hey, just accept it, it, learn from it. Find the good in every adversity that come your way. There is definitely some good in it. Of course, it's hard to analyze it in that very moment, but if you'll see it in in couple of years or later on, you'll see that. I'm so glad that happened because that has prepared me for this moment today.

Gurasis:

Where I am today, I also had our common friend, a mutual friend on the podcast, shruti, who was here, and with her I was talking about how important it is to have people on the decision-making process who will understand the pain points of new hires and, in our immigrant experience situation, understand the importance of the international experience. And I think that's where you were telling me that I want to place people where they belong. As you are in the leadership role right now, tell us how building that ecosystem has really accelerated people's success, or accelerated the success of immigrants in your observation.

Vrinda:

Absolutely. I think it's a very important point to recognize as immigrants, and especially for some of us who are fortunate enough to be in a position where we have the ability to help and pay forward. I'll go back to what I said. If you come with the expectation of getting a very similar job, you know, make sure that you put your best foot forward society. Through my connections, I'm definitely making an attempt to either recommend those people to get in a job or at least get a job interview. If it's not with me, what I tend to do is at least try to give them a platform where they can show what they're capable of, and I think that's huge. I think we should be thankful that we're all, at least we're getting that opportunity. A lot of people don't get that.

Vrinda:

If I am able to hire somebody, you know it's I'd say this again, for you know, first deserve, then desire is important, and I say that in a very, you know, unique way because as an individual, as I know what I deserve before I desire. So I can't speak for you or I can't speak for someone else, but I think it's a self assessment that people have to make. It's in no shape or form trying to say oh my God, what do you mean? I don't deserve, I don't deserve this. I don't know. You probably do, or you probably don't make that decision for yourself. So when you come to me for an interview, or you, when you go to somebody else for an interview and you want a GM role, think about it.

Vrinda:

Do you deserve it? So, first deserve, then desire is my piece, and if you know that you deserve it, then you're going to put your best foot forward. You're going to be, you know, the person who's supposed to get that job and there's no doubt that you will win it. There has been situations or examples that I am very proud of, where I've had people who have come in with a banking background. They've done and I've been able to connect them with, you know, my counterparts within CRBC, where they've interviewed. They've, you know, shown their best, put their best foot forward and secured the roles in a level in, in the levels that they deserve to be. They didn't have to start from scratch like I did.

Gurasis:

Right.

Vrinda:

So that's what's paying it forward is. I was a very small, I would say, you know path for their success. I take no credit to that because I still leave it to them, right, and as should we. Right, I can put in a recommendation, I can say this person is trustworthy, but take your call and I expect the same thing, right, like I want people to recommend people or put in a reference, because it goes a long way and that's the way hiring is going anyway. Let's face it right. It's not those days when you apply for a job you get, you know, get a call, and gone are the days, especially with a name like me, rinda, srikant or Gurasis or what have you Like. Gone are the days when you know a lot of people didn't even call me for an interview, I would say, because they couldn't pronounce my name. And believe you me, having done my master's in HR, having done a project in recruitment, this is something that used to happen a lot. It hasn't gone away yet. There's still a lot of places. If you go, you don't get an interview call because the recruiter is not able to pronounce your name or they just have a bias just looking at your name.

Vrinda:

I'll just give you a quick example here. I had a friend who was give you a quick example here. I had a, you know, a friend who was doing her master's with me. She was from BC, but we were doing it from University of Regina. In this particular class she shared how she had a Chinese name and every time she applied she didn't receive a call. She got married to a Caucasian. She changed her name on the resume to her Caucasian name, to Sarah, and she said you won't believe, every job I've applied for I got a call. So this is a true example that somebody shared in the class, and that was four or five years ago, so it's not gone away.

Vrinda:

So a lot of things right. This is a lot to unpack, actually Just deviating from where we started. Yes, giving back is important. Yes, putting people in positions that they deserve when they come to this country, because this country promises a lot. Networking is key. Get in touch, talk to people Polish yourself. Continuous education is important. Build on what you have. Continue to do that and anybody can do anything.

Vrinda:

Just stay positive, the glass is always half full, not empty Absolutely.

Gurasis:

Yeah, and I'm so. And you know, sometimes I think not everybody knows their way around the system, and I'm so glad there are people like you who are in those roles. Who's able to make that decision? Yeah, I'm so glad that there are people, people like you who are in that position to make that role, because I remember you telling me that somebody else also took a chance on you. Somebody else else also gave you a chance. That's why not you give somebody else a chance as well, and especially if somebody does have the experience 100%.

Vrinda:

just because you did that doesn't mean other person has to go through it. If they deserve it Again goes back to deserving.

Gurasis:

And I wish more and more people understand that, because then there are examples where people say that I have gone through this, you will also go through this, and I really absolutely hate those people. And the funny thing is I have come across many of those people and many of the listeners. You know some of the listeners I'm in contact with. That has happened with them also. People have told them oh, you also have to go to the same thing because I went through, instead of collaborating together, learning from each other. Your experience can actually act as a catalyst in other people's success, so why not to do it? Totally agree with you on that. So now, before we get into the final segment of the podcast, I am going to introduce this new segment I'm calling this know your host where I'm giving my guests an opportunity to ask me any question you want love it, oh, love it.

Vrinda:

Okay, so here goes, this is your rapid fire. Okay what is the one thing that you've discovered about yourself, Whether after coming to Canada or just as part of your life learning?

Gurasis:

a chef within me, I did not know that I could cook well food and I'm not, you know, tooting my own horn here. But I think my friends have told me, the people who have tasted my food, they've told me because before that, back in india I don't think so I have ever cooked, apart from maggie, or boiled few eggs probably, maybe in worst case scenarios, but otherwise the food is always served, just like all of us. You know everybody who comes from their home countries. The food is served to them all the time.

Gurasis:

But when I came here I started experimenting. Of course you know I have had my own mistakes where where I have burnt the garlic so much and the food tasted bitter. Then I learned to learn to okay, no, knitting the correct, correct time to put the onions in, making sure the onions are. So it's like I think I have also evolved with that perfection and I have learned. I think now I have, I'm able to cook, you know, mexican food I have. I have cooked, obviously like thai food, obviously indian, which I absolutely love, and I think I love food a lot. That's what I have learned from myself, that I love every kind of food, and I'm not at all hesitant to really experience anything new that come my way.

Gurasis:

I'm absolutely okay with that. And another thing I would add to that is I've also learned to try it by and not in terms of cooking only, but in terms of anything. Because growing up I always had that fear of trying it, that thinking so much about the repercussions of things, that what if? What will that happen? Why? What if it doesn't go the way I wanted to go? Or or because it was something, because I think we have grown up in a culture I was not in a culture where it was more about doing things, keeping in mind the repercussions of what will people say. You know so to say. But I think now I am really unlearning that and learning that it's absolutely okay to do whatever you want to do. Try it, experiment it. If it works out, great, if it doesn't, it was a great experience and you can use that experience somewhere else. So, yeah, these two things I would say first, definitely, I think I like cooking. I find it therapeutic.

Gurasis:

And second, having no fear of trying, experimenting, new yeah.

Vrinda:

Absolutely Love it, love it, love it. My second question would be oh, there's another one, I thought there's only one. Oh, is there only one? Okay, no, please, please go ahead.

Gurasis:

I'm just kidding.

Vrinda:

No, I was just curious. You know, to know a little bit about. You know you've been here and you've made a living in the last few years and you do these interviews. Is there one individual that you interviewed in so the last season so far that stands out to you, that you feel like this was powerful?

Gurasis:

it's a very hard question because I think I say it all the time I have learned so much from each guest of mine, each guest, and it's very hard to choose one.

Gurasis:

But if I'll tell you, like a general topic, general discussions which really I would say shape the way I wanted to drive my podcast, I would say that the one was my discussion with Shola Rose.

Gurasis:

She is originally from Nigeria and her episode was called have Blinders Towards Hate Speech and that gave me a very good perspective of because she is, you know, black origin and how she perceived things. She said that whenever somebody asked me you know how are you, english is so good or any question about my color or anything that she came across, she said it's really important to give people the benefit of the doubt rather than you taking it to your heart, because if you do, it really stops you from going to the goal that you really want to achieve. So that really stayed with me that this is such a beautiful thing, that it's. Yes. Obviously it's important to gauge whether the person is coming from the point of curiosity, the person who is genuinely curious about the colors of my turban, or the person is just being racist and you don't want to go on the racist side, because you don't want to brew negativity, it's okay person said something, move on in your life.

Gurasis:

You don't have have to, you know, like she said, have blinders towards those and welcome and appreciate the question, the one who is generally curious about it, and answer it. So I think this, that episode, that conversation, was really an eye opener for me for various reasons and really helped me shave and drive my conversations I had with the people. Yeah, I would say that Beautiful.

Vrinda:

I think you put it really well.

Gurasis:

So it's my turn now. Now we are in the final segment of the podcast. I call it Beneath the Accent Because we are knowing each other beneath the accent. I'm going to ask a couple of questions. You can answer them in one word or a sentence, or however you feel like. The idea is just to know more about Vrinda, so ready, ready. First, the classic question what advice would you give to Vrinda who is in the initial months of landing in Canada? What advice? Stay positive. Describe a moment when you experienced a significant cultural difference that surprised you.

Vrinda:

Significant cultural difference. I think I'll go back to time in Weyburn. I think it's so rural that it's very hard to relate to a lot of things that people do differently. If I had to name one, it's just the I don't know ice fishing.

Gurasis:

Okay, I never heard about that.

Vrinda:

Who does ice fishing? That was a shocker to me. A lot of people do ice ice fishing, apparently okay that's what then it's. It's a different. You know, feeling comfortable in the cold, the minus 45, sitting outside fishing. I still can't relate to that. So that would that could be me. I appreciate it. I would enjoy doing it. If someone teaches me how to do it, don't get me wrong, but that's something that was completely I was blown away. I was like, wow, you do that.

Gurasis:

Okay, good for you. What's this one dish from your home country that always brings your comfort and nostalgia?

Vrinda:

Chole Bhature.

Gurasis:

Anytime.

Vrinda:

Or Golgappa.

Gurasis:

Okay, what's your favorite cultural festival or celebration in canada and how do you usually celebrate it? Uh?

Vrinda:

in canada. I think thanksgiving, if it, if it has to be canadian, yeah, um, thanksgiving, because I feel like it, anybody can relate to thanksgiving. I don't think you need to be from a certain culture to be able to give thanks for what you have. And I think we don't think you need to be from a certain culture to be able to give thanks for what you have. And I think we don't express gratitude enough for what we have. And I think, taking that moment, that day off, to be with your family, to be thankful for your family, I think I would definitely we do that year over year. We make an attempt to, you know, do what we can to say thanks and get together, and I think that would be one thing, canadian, and if it is indian, I think diwali it's okay, definitely we we like to enjoy, we, you know, get together with friends, play cards, do what we, you know, used to do in delhi, I guess okay, and is there something from your home country or your tradition that you managed to preserve up until today in Canada?

Gurasis:

Any object, my mother's ring.

Vrinda:

I got that when I got married and I still have it. I still wear it, so it's very near and dear to me and that would be one thing that comes to my mind that I've carried Tell us about your first friend that you made in Canada.

Vrinda:

First friend that I made in Canada, oh, wow, yes, you know what, when I first came to Saskatchewan, bc not that many friends, but when we first came to Weyburn, saskatchewan, my husband was, you know. He was there already for three months and was craving Indian food. So he took me to a real Canadian superstore there and I didn't know where to look for these things. Right it's? They don't have a lot of Indian stuff there, but they did. So. He wanted to have, I don't know, chole or something. I don't know what he wanted to have at that time, but I saw an Indian person walking in superstore. I followed them.

Gurasis:

Okay.

Vrinda:

I, you know. I made an attempt to introduce myself and say hello and I started speaking, you know, and I asked him, do you speak Hindi? And he said yes, and then he got very excited because he was. They also didn't have too many people and he said you know what? You should meet my wife. She works for Walmart. And it was such a small. I said, yeah, sure, we're going to Walmart now. So he told me her name. I went to Walmart. I asked for Rimi. Her name is Ramandeep Kaur. They're also from Punjab and, believe me you, we became the thick of friends. We still are friends.

Vrinda:

We went to Vegas earlier this year we went to my husband and I Rimi posted on Facebook that she's on her way. We met in Vegas after so many years. So we were in Weyburn. They moved to Vancouver, we moved to Toronto, but we have some fond memories of you. Know, if you want to, when that question comes to me, who's your first friend? In Canada, I would say it was Rimi and Simran. In Canada, I would say it was Remy and Sindran. You know they were best friends and they continue to be very, you know, in touch.

Gurasis:

That's an incredible story. I love that.

Vrinda:

I know, I do things like this yeah amazing.

Gurasis:

And have you tried maple syrup on anything surprising?

Vrinda:

I'm not a big fan of maple syrup, oh, okay, so not, oh, I am lying. Oh, okay, a smoky maple syrup flavor, so that that's something different. That you know, combination of maple syrup and whiskey? I would have even thought of it, but we had that on a cruise there in quebec, which is pretty neat okay, if you could create this one law that everybody has to follow, what would it be? Really thoughtful questions, thought provoking.

Gurasis:

One law that everybody should follow in canada or generally in general, if you want to separate, that would be even better.

Vrinda:

But whatever you say, I would just say um stop, stop the fight that's happening in the world right now. You know, can I?

Vrinda:

if I can introduce a law that can just have peace in the world. I think it's important and I'm not just saying it to sound really good. It's really hurtful to see I've been following the Hamas, you know Israel war so closely and it's just so hurtful to hear and see people who have nothing to do with this war but they're getting hurt and this is just going to add to the agony of war as we move forward. And this is just going to add to the agony of war as we move forward. You know, people who are being hurt for no reason are going to stand up and start fighting for no reason because they were hurt. And that's kind of the history that we've been seeing. And I think if I had the ability to create a law, and that would be it no fighting, stop it.

Vrinda:

What is this? Same thing in Ukraine? And it's just been going on for almost two years now. What is this? It's impacting everybody across the globe and if it, this is going to lead to world war. Can you imagine, like what is the lives of our future going to look like?

Vrinda:

yeah, absolutely so, yeah, that would be me. I know it's, it's sad, but that just comes to my mind and you know, following it so closely. I think all of us are impacted in some way or the other.

Gurasis:

I mean absolutely. I think, seeing me as me as well, you know, coming across all those posts and stories, I think definitely I would have created the same law to please have peace, so stop.

Vrinda:

Yeah, stop it.

Gurasis:

Okay, if you could swap lives with somebody for a day, who would it be and why?

Vrinda:

Nobody. I love my life. I'm very thankful. I don't want to go become somebody else. No, I think I'm grateful, very humble, for everything that I have, and I think, you know, gratitude is important. I'm very grateful. I'm not looking to become somebody else.

Gurasis:

Love that. Do you have any quirky habits or rituals that you follow in your daily routine?

Vrinda:

oh, I don't know if you want to say that or share that. I love my coffee in the morning. Okay, it's non-negotiable, and that coffee, you know I love to have it as soon as I wake up and, you know, relax watching tv first thing in the morning news basically, if you could be a contestant at any reality tv show, which one would you choose?

Vrinda:

it would be um a musical show because, um, I have learned, uh, carnatic classical music for 14 years of my life and I do believe that, you know, I've sung in the radio and stuff like that. So if I want, to revise that.

Gurasis:

I would do that for sure okay but this is also sort of like a radio platform. Can you sing something for us? I would love that.

Vrinda:

I'm not ready.

Gurasis:

Nobody's judging, no judgment here. Safe zone Okay, there's no music.

Gurasis Singh:

Okay, Ajeep daasata hai kaha shuru, kaha kadam? Ye manzil hai kaun si na ho, samajh ke na hum.

Gurasis:

That's it. Love that Beautiful Applause.

Vrinda:

Love that, Thank you. Thank you for making me sing Gurasi.

Gurasis:

I wasn't ready for that. You're never ready for these conversations. I know, impromptu. So describe Canada in one word or a sentence land of possibilities safe. I can say that for now if you could leave me with one piece of advice, what would it be?

Vrinda:

you're killing it. One piece of advice I would say, not for you per se, just generally. This is one thing I do believe in and it is you know, it's not the smartest person who always gets that promotion or moves forward. It's the person who's the hungriest who moves forward. And you know how I came about this after I watched your podcast, also very relatable to you know, from what I shared in the beginning of my in school not being academically inclined, being in sports and stuff. It's not always the people who are smartest, who have the best grades, who go forward or who are really good at what they do. It's how hungry you are to get go to the next you know level or what have you in life, just generally, in life, whether it could be career or whatever, I I feel that. So that would be my piece to be hungry to, to you know, to really want to do better at what you really think you want to do in life. Be hungry for it. I think people succeed.

Gurasis:

I love that. You know. I think a few years ago I came across this quote that says I think it was from the alchemist, from the book alchemist. It says it's not the fastest or the smartest person who wins. It's the person who thinks he can who wins wow, I love that yeah, so true, it is actually.

Vrinda:

Yes, put your mind and heart to it.

Gurasis:

You can do it, yeah and finally, how would you describe your experience of being on the podcast?

Vrinda:

oh, my god, I don't have words. I think I will be selling this show short if I didn't use the proper adjectives to actually describe, uh, this hour and a half that I spent with you, grosie. So I think it was absolutely humbling what comes to my mind, really, because you put me at that pedestal with your fantastic words to describe or open this whole season. I'm really honored, I think you may you, you bring out the best in people, if I can put it that way.

Vrinda:

Your questions are very thought provoking I wouldn't have thought about. You know, people don't think about these things, about themselves, unless questions are asked, and that's why I say I feel very honored to be here, because this opportunity has actually made me think about things about my life, about me, that I wouldn't have otherwise thought. And same thing with your podcast, with everybody else that I've heard so far. I think you kind of indulge in a conversation which is so meaningful, not just for your show but for the person who's actually on your show and also for your listeners. So kudos to you for doing that, taking that time out, and I think it's becoming just popular and more popular. So thank you.

Gurasis:

Yeah, thank you. Thank you so much for your kind words and I am honored and thank you for your questions that you asked and I'm sure that listeners would be having the same questions about the host, I'm sure. But really, really, really enjoyed this conversation, vrinda, and I'm looking forward for people to really listen to this and learn more and more from this. So, thank you, thank you so much for being on the podcast and adding value to my listeners. Thank you.

Vrinda:

Same here. Thank you ever so much for having me. It's my pleasure and honor. Thank you.

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